Supporting Your Student – Page 18 – College Parent Central

Connecting With Your College Student By Phone — Part 1

March 25, 2017June 16, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

This is the first post in a three part series about phone conversations with your college student. In the next post, we’ll consider how your phone conversations might change as the semester progresses. In the final post of the series, we offer some suggestions for maximizing your phone conversations with your student.

Regular phone conversations with your college student are a great way to stay in touch with what is happening in your student’s life – and for her to stay in touch with life at home. Even if you keep up with each other via e-mail, Facebook, or some other electronic medium, there is nothing quite like hearing each other’s voice. However, just because the technology allows us instant contact, it doesn’t mean that every conversation will be satisfying. Here are some suggestions that will help to maximize your conversations with your college student.

Make it routine.

Consider setting up a regular time for your student to phone you. Let your student phone you, rather than you calling him, so that he will choose a time when he is available for a conversation. Reaching him on his cell phone while he is at dinner with his friends may not yield the most meaningful conversation.

Twelve Things You Can Do To Help You Listen To Your College Student

March 18, 2020June 15, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

Communication between parents and teenagers is often difficult. As parents of college students we have lived through most of those difficult years. Now that your student is headed off to college and you may not have the same kind of daily contact with them, you want to make good use of the times that you do communicate with them. Although you may not see your student for several weeks (if they are living away), you may talk more often. Daily phone conversations may not be the best way to encourage independence, but you may want to establish some regular phone contact to help you stay connected. You also want to take advantage of those conversations that happen when your student does come home for a visit.

So now that communication with your college student may happen less often, you want to maximize the opportunities that you have. What can you do? The short answer is to talk less and listen more. You may be surprised at how much you will learn about your student simply by listening. Here are twelve suggestions that will help you listen more carefully to your college student.

What To Do If Your Student Is Academically Dismissed From College

November 24, 2017June 8, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

When you send your student off to college you hope and assume that he will be successful. Most students are successful and do well. However, some students struggle – either socially or academically. No parent wants to receive the news that his or her student has been academically dismissed from college because of poor performance. It is distressing and disheartening news. But it does happen, and parents need to help students deal with the situation. Although you may be disappointed, and possibly angry, your response may be a large factor in helping your student move forward.

Here are some things to consider if your college student is academically dismissed from college.

Ten Things To Do If You Need To Call Your Child’s College

August 19, 2019May 22, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

As a college parent you’ve listened to all of the advice and you’re working hard to help your college student gain independence and responsibility. You encourage her to handle her own problems and talk to the appropriate contact people at the college when she has questions or problems. But something has come up and you feel that it is absolutely necessary for you to step in and talk to someone at the school. What do you do now?

Here are ten things to consider that will make your phone call effective.

College Parent? Inspiration for Your New Coaching Role

April 26, 2018May 20, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

If you’re a new college parent, you’re shifting to a new role as a sideline coach: still involved in your student’s life and success, but with a new approach. It’s time to get inspired about your new role!

Many of the world’s greatest athletes credit their success to the influence of their coaches. They recognize that, while they may have certain abilities, they need the teaching, insight, and training that a quality coach can provide. You may have thought of yourself in this role before – or this may be a new image for you. Either way, let’s explore some of the wisdom of the world’s greatest coaches and consider what it means to be a great coach.

Your Role As a College Parent: Sideline Coach

January 5, 2024May 19, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

As your child heads off to college, you are probably experiencing many emotions. That is only natural. It means that you recognize the enormity of the step that your child is taking. Remember how it felt when he headed to kindergarten, or got behind the wheel of the car for the first time? In many ways, this new phase is similar.

It is important to remember that this is a new stage for you as well as for your student. As the parent of a college freshman, your role is changing in significant ways. We’re often so busy focusing on our student that we forget that this is a transition for us as well.

Your coaching role

If your student is going to be living away from home, you know that your home-life will be different — more food, less laundry, more quiet, fewer dirty dishes. You’ll no longer be in the middle of it all with the action swirling around you.

So you now have a choice. You can feel lost and useless, or you can embrace your new role – as coach. Like any good coach, there comes a time to step back and observe the results of your hard work.

No matter how important the ”big game” is, the coach is on the sidelines. No matter how much he may want to, the coach can’t play the game for the players. But if the coach has done his work in the pre-season, during all of those long practice hours, the players know what to do on the field. As a parent, we need to know that we’ve done our ”pre-season” work. We need to trust our student to get onto the field and play the game.

We also need to remember that the coach has a job to do on the sidelines of the game. The players need him there. The coach gives suggestions about plays, congratulates and supports, scolds, cajoles, and sometimes registers displeasure. The coach is involved in the game, even though he’s not on the field.

And sometimes, the coach needs to take the player into the locker room and give him a talking to so the player will ”shape up” and play the rest of the game differently.

It’s Final Exam Time: What’s a College Parent To Do?

November 28, 2021May 13, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

Sometimes, it may seem as though one of the most difficult positions for a college parent to be in, is the situation when you know that your student is struggling and you feel as though you cannot do a lot to help. Sometimes final exam period may feel like one of those times. You can’t take the exams for your child. You may be too far away to help them study (and you probably shouldn’t be doing that at this point anyway). You know that your student is stressed, and exhausted, and you must simply stand back.

Actually, you may not be completely helpless. There are several ways in which you might help at this final exam time.

Reach Out To Your College Student Through Good Old-fashioned Snail Mail

April 23, 2021May 5, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

There are so many ways to communicate with your college student these days that it can be overwhelming. Do you call, text, instant message, write on her facebook wall, skype, video conference, or twitter? Technology today has allowed us to stay in touch with our students on a daily, or sometimes hourly basis. A topic of a future post will be some of the thinking about the wisdom of staying too closely in touch, but this post isn’t about any of the technical wonders of communication. It is about the old fashioned technology of the college mailbox.

Even with the array of technological advances for communication, most students are still assigned a college mailbox when they arrive at college. Your student’s mailbox may be located in his residence hall, or may be located in a student center or college union. One of the rituals of college life is still going to check that mailbox, if not daily, at least occasionally. It is a great way to send a message to your college student in addition to whatever other means you usually use.

Parenting Your College Transfer Student: Navigating the Transfer Process

March 18, 2017April 23, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

In our last post, we considered some ways in which you might help your college student think about a transfer to another college. Here, we consider how to help your student through the actual transfer process itself. Our next post will examine ways in which you can support your new transfer student.

Once your college student has made a decision to transfer to another college, there are some important tasks to be done.

Gather lots of information about potential colleges and/or programs.

Your student may know exactly where he wants to transfer, or he may be looking for the appropriate school. The more information he can gather, the more smoothly the process will go. One advantage that your student now has is the knowledge he has gained through the time he has spent at his current school. As he thinks about the reasons for transferring, he will think of questions he wants to be sure that he asks at the new school. What are his priorities? What wasn’t working (if anything) at the current school? Encourage him to take time to look carefully at the new institution. Study the website. Visit the school. Stay overnight on campus if possible. Talk to current students. Meet with admissions or advising personnel at the new school. Ask lots of questions.

Connecting With Your College Student By Phone — Part 1

Twelve Things You Can Do To Help You Listen To Your College Student

What To Do If Your Student Is Academically Dismissed From College

Ten Things To Do If You Need To Call Your Child’s College

College Parent? Inspiration for Your New Coaching Role

Your Role As a College Parent: Sideline Coach

It’s Final Exam Time: What’s a College Parent To Do?

Reach Out To Your College Student Through Good Old-fashioned Snail Mail

Parenting Your College Transfer Student: Navigating the Transfer Process

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