The Missing Piece in Many Student (and Parent) Orientations

August 29, 2023August 29, 2023 by Vicki Nelson

Most students, and many parents, participate in an Orientation session (sometimes multiple days) at the beginning of the college journey. Colleges work hard to help students and parents understand what to expect, learn about resources, and be prepared for the road ahead.

But for many students and their families, there may be a missing (or under-emphasized) piece – information about campus sexual violence.

It’s a topic that makes many of us, especially as parents, uncomfortable. We don’t like to think about it, we assume it won’t be an issue for our student, and as long as it is at least touched upon during Orientation we assume and hope that is enough.

It may not be.

Why?

Fact: 1 in 4 female students, 1 in 15 male students, and 1 in 5 gender nonconforming students are sexually assaulted during their college year.

Fact: What experts refer to as “the red zone”, the time between the start of the fall semester through Thanksgiving break is a time when more than 50% of all college sexual assaults are statistically found to occur. This is the time of parties, Greek “rush” events and a time when first-year students are particularly vulnerable because of their unfamiliarity with the campus and lack of a strong on-campus support group.

Fact: More than 90% of these incidents are perpetrated by repeat offenders.

Fact: Less than 10% of sexual assaults are reported.

Your Student Needs This Time Over Winter Break

December 26, 2022December 13, 2022 by Vicki Nelson

This article is an update of an earlier article.

Winter Break. Most college students look forward to it – and they get increasingly impatient for it as the semester draws to a close. Students face deadlines they may have ignored, final papers, final projects, final exams, and a generally stressful few weeks as they finish up their term.

Winter Break

Students don’t want this Break, they need this Break. They’ve worked hard all semester and they need a chance to regroup. This winter, no one is sure what to expect. Covid, the flu, and RSV are making everyone a little nervous. We’re inching back to normal and we hope Winter Break will be comfortable and safe for everyone. The next few weeks may prove challenging for everyone. But wherever you are and whatever your circumstances, most students need one thing as this semester draws to a close: time.

Not all time is the same

No matter how long your student’s break from college, they need to fill it with different kinds of time to help them recharge and to prepare to move forward.

Eight kinds of time your student needs

Downtime

The end of the semester can be brutal for some students. Your student may come home and sleep for what seems like days. They may just want to binge watch their favorites, play video games, eat junk food, sleep some more and just hang out.

#073 – Sleep Matters: Why Don’t College Students Get Enough – and Why They Should

September 27, 2022September 21, 2022 by Vicki Nelson

We see sleepy students every day in our classes. Why? They aren’t getting enough sleep. In this episode Vicki and Lynn explore the connections between sleep and learning, the reasons students don’t get enough sleep and what happens when they are sleep deprived. We also share some suggestions to help students make their sleep hygiene a priority. Talking with your student about sleep can help highlight this important issue– and it might even improve everyone’s shuteye!

SUBSCRIBE VIA
Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn Radio | iHeart Radio

Please leave us a review at “Love the Podcast” to help others find us.

Oh, Those Noisy Dorms!

September 13, 2022 by Vicki Nelson

Has your college student complained about the noisy dorms yet? If not, it may be coming. And they may not be exaggerating. Dorms can be wonderful, homey, fun, social spaces – but they can also be noisy and boisterous.

How noisy a dorm is might depend on the school and the culture. There are certainly party schools where there may be more activity and other schools where life may be more laid-back. And the noise level may also depend on the particular dorm at any given school. Different residence halls often have reputations as party dorms, athletic dorms, international dorms, substance free dorms or quiet study dorms.

And just how much all of that commotion bothers your student will depend on their interests and tolerance. Some students thrive on being in the midst of all of the activity and social life while others find it off-putting at best and overwhelming at worst.

College Decisions in the Midst of COVID-19

May 26, 2020 by Vicki Nelson

Making the decision about where to attend college is never easy. There’s a lot riding on that choice. And sometimes, making the decision about whether to head to school right away or to take a gap year can be a tough choice as well. But this year, as we struggle our way through a pandemic, these decisions are harder than ever for many students.

If you and your student are grappling with these important decisions, it may feel as though you are working your way through a fog. You can’t see very far ahead. You may not be sure where you are at the moment. And you aren’t sure what others are doing. You feel alone and not a little lost as you try to find the right path.

What do people think?

As you try to think through your student’s options for fall semester, you may wonder what other parents and students are thinking. What are your options? What way are others leaning?

#018 – Spiritual Health and College Students – An Interview with Rev. Terry Hofmann

December 3, 2021May 20, 2020 by Vicki Nelson

We talk a lot about college student intellectual, social and emotional development, but there are fewer conversations around college students’ spiritual development. In this guest interview, Lynn and Vicki talk with Rev. Terry Hofmann who has served as a Director of Spiritual Life at a small liberal arts college for ten years. Terry brings to this conversation her wealth of knowledge and experience with college students as they explore their spiritual and religious identities. Terry shares ideas for supporting students in the various aspects of spiritual health and wellness.

Subscribe to our podcast: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn Radio

Completing the College Year at Home

March 15, 2020 by Vicki Nelson

It seems as though the entire world has gone upside down right now. Life is surreal and not a little bit terrifying. The Coronavirus dominates the news, most events have been cancelled, we’re all staying closer to home, some of us are working from home, schools are closing, and we all wonder what’s next.

If you have a college student, there’s a good chance that they are home, or headed home, possibly for the remainder of the school year. Many colleges are moving their courses online and it’s going to be a whole new world for many college students — and for their families.

We’re all going to be readjusting for the next few days. Everything feels awkward and out of place right now and it may take some time before your student finds their ”new normal.” Stay flexible and go with the flow. Be available for your student, who may want to talk – or may not. Unlike Break, your student isn’t on vacation this time, they’ve just shifted where and how they’ll need to do college — at least for a little while.

Helping Your College Student Cope with Stress

October 15, 2019December 11, 2017 by Vicki Nelson

College students experience a lot of stress. As parents, some of us are acutely aware of our student’s stress levels, and to others of us it may be less obvious. Of course, not every student experiences stress, and some students actually thrive on a certain amount of it; but many college students find that increased pressure or anxiety are part of the experience of college.

Consider some of the following information gathered about student stress as you think about your own student’s potential stress levels. Discuss some of these findings with your student to help them realize that they, and/or their friends, may not be alone if they are experiencing anxiety.

College students experience a lot of stress — but it’s not all bad

The Associated Press and MTV conducted a survey of college students to consider college student stress. They surveyed over 2,200 students at 40 randomly chosen colleges throughout the United States. Although the survey is several years old, the results have not changed much, or may be even more concerning in recent years. Some of the findings of this College Stress and Mental Health poll are included below.

85% of students feel stressed on a daily basis
60% of students at some time have felt stress to the point of not being able to get work done
70% of students have never considered talking to a counselor about their stress
84% of students reach out to friends to help them with their stress
67% of students reach out to parents for help with stress

The good news is that in spite of these statistics regarding stress levels, 74% of students reported feeling very or somewhat happy. Clearly, not all stress is bad.

Discussing Campus Safety With Your College Student

December 27, 2017July 24, 2017 by Vicki Nelson

As college parents, one of our major concerns when our students head off to college is their safety. We want our students to do well academically, we want them to be healthy, we want them to be happy, but first and foremost, we want them to be safe.

Ideally, a three way partnership will do the most to help keep college students safe. Parents need to talk to their students about safety, students need to exercise awareness and behave responsibly, and colleges need to take precautions to keep students safe.

Concern for the safety of college students is a growing national concern in light of recent incidents and tragedies on college campuses. One law and one initiative in particular attempt to address this concern.

College Parents Warned of Phone Scam — Don’t Be a Victim

March 25, 2017October 10, 2016 by Vicki Nelson

The con artists are at it again. But this time, it’s not college students who are the target, it’s their parents. This scam, a ”virtual kidnapping” scam, has been around for a couple of years, with the FBI issuing warnings in January 2015, but authorities are warning parents that it seems to be on the rise again in the past few months. Several colleges in several states, including Arizona State University, George Mason University and the University of Texas at Arlington, have issued warnings to parents.

As with so many scams, knowledge is power. Being aware that this scam exists is the best first defense against becoming a victim.

In the ”virtual kidnapping” scam, parents receive a phone call from a stranger who claims to have kidnapped their child. Sometimes parents hear muffled screams or cries in the background. Someone who sounds much like their child may even get on the phone quickly, crying and begging them to pay whatever is asked. Calls come from outside area codes, often 787 or 939 — Puerto Rican codes. The call may come from a blocked or private number. The caller knows the child’s name and often many details as well. These details are often gleaned from public information and/or social media sites.