When Your College Student Is Struggling Or In Trouble

May 12, 2020March 4, 2013 by Vicki Nelson

You send your college student off to college with high hopes. It was a long road of applications, SATs, essays, and finally decision making. You and your college student have survived and now you are ready to sit back and watch him thrive in the environment that he chose.

Suddenly, things are not going as planned. Your student is struggling and having difficulty. Your student may or may not be sharing details with you, but you sense that something is wrong. You feel completely helpless, and you want to help. This is every college parent’s nightmare.

Your student may be struggling for any number of reasons — from lack of preparedness, lack of motivation, lack of perseverance, too much partying, mental or emotional difficulties, or just plain homesickness. Whatever the reason, you’re at a loss for where to turn.

Here at College Parent Central, we want to help you navigate all of the phases of college parenting, and for many families that includes navigating the dark waters of a student in trouble.

So You’re a New College Parent . . .

March 5, 2023February 25, 2013 by Vicki Nelson

Congratulations! You’ve survived the college admissions process and the acceptance letters have begun to arrive. You are excited for your student, but you may be beginning to be a bit nervous. Now that your son or daughter is almost a college student, you’re almost a college parent! You may have been involved in helping your student through the admissions process — but now you wonder what you should be doing and exactly what your new role will be.

If you’re a new college parent, and you’re here at College Parent Central, you’ve found the right place to get started. Parents of college students are often told to ”let go”, but we believe it’s all about knowing how your role changes and finding the ways that you can be productively involved to help your student throughout his college career.

What is College Block Scheduling?

March 18, 2017February 21, 2013 by Vicki Nelson

Each college creates a course schedule to serve its needs. Whatever the individual college’s schedule looks like, your student’s college schedule will certainly look very different from his high school schedule. Students spend much less time in class in college and are expected to spend much more time outside of class reading and preparing. The general rule of thumb is for students to spend two hours outside of class for each hour spent in class. Students often spend 2 – 4 hours per week, per course, in class.

Most colleges and universities have a mix of class meeting times. Some classes might meet for shorter periods of time three times per week, others might meet twice per week, and still others might meet for a longer period once per week. Students often mix and match a combination of classes.

There is, however, one radically different approach used by approximately a dozen or so colleges in the United States called ”Block Scheduling” or ”One Course At A Time (OCAAT) Scheduling.” It is a unique approach.

What Does College “Open Admission” Mean?

May 17, 2022February 18, 2013 by Vicki Nelson

College admission is a major concern for many high school students and their parents. The entire admission process may feel overwhelming, time consuming, and expensive. As part of the exploration process, you may come across schools that list their admission policy as ”Open Admission,” ”Open Enrollment,” or ”Inclusive Admission.” What exactly does this mean?

Open Admission generally means that the admission process is unselective and non-competitive; the only criteria for admission is that the student have a high school diploma or GED certificate. Most colleges with Open Admission are community colleges or colleges which grant Associate degrees. There are a few, but not many, four year colleges with this type of admission policy.

Open Enrollment or Open Admission policies were instituted during the 1960’s and 1970’s to reduce barriers to higher education for some groups of students, including those from lower income or underprivileged backgrounds. The policy of increasing accessibility was intended to provide a college education to all who desire it. It allows students with a wide range of potential to attend college.

What’s In a Name? The Value of Name-calling

March 23, 2017February 4, 2013 by Vicki Nelson

We all grew up being taught that name-calling is bad. We probably taught our children the same thing. We’re not suggesting that we change our basic principles. Name-calling, labeling, is almost always based on a generalization and stereotype and we need to value and respect people as individuals — and so should our children.

However, some of the labels that are sometimes given to groups of people often have a grain of truth in them. While we don’t necessarily want to totally accept and believe them, or perpetuate them, holding the mirror up and questioning whether there is truth in them may be helpful.

Consider some of the labels below that have been given to us as parents, and to our generation of children — the current college student generation. While we admit that some are extreme, the label comes from somewhere. Understanding the label and confronting it may be the first step toward addressing an issue — and defining a new identity for us and for our students.

Three Essential Elements of College Parental Support

May 4, 2020January 28, 2013 by Vicki Nelson

As college parents, we want to support our college students. However, defining that support is sometimes more difficult than it seems. Each school is different. Each parent is different. Each student is different and may take a different path. Some students need more support than others at different times during their college career. As a parent, how do you know how best to help your student?

You will, of course, need to find your own way, but there are three essential elements that might provide the foundation of any plan to help your student. Start with these. Think about what they look like for you — and for your family. Then let your plan build from there.

Insist on honesty

This doesn’t necessarily mean that you expect your college student to share every detail of their daily life with you. There are probably some things you’d rather not know. It does mean, however, that you expect your student to be honest — about the reality of their progress in all of its potentially ugly details. If they’re failing a class, they need to let you know. If they are on probation, they need to tell you. If they’ve gotten into some kind of trouble, they need to share that with you. If their credit card is maxed out, they might ask for advice about how to deal with it.

What to Expect From Your Student’s Second Semester of College

January 27, 2021January 24, 2013 by Vicki Nelson

You and your college student have survived the transitional first semester of college. For some students, the transition goes smoothly. Other students may struggle, either academically, socially, or emotionally. Whatever happened, you’ve made it to the second semester. This may be more of a milestone than you and your student realize. The second semester is a wonderful opportunity for your student to make a fresh start — or take the college experience to the next level.

The beginning of the second semester of college is a more thoughtful return to college. Your student has a better idea of what to expect, and that may make the semester ahead seem especially long and hard. Your student may return with some mixed feelings. The novelty has worn off and there is less build up this semester. Everyone assumes that your student is now settled in. Several friends from first semester may not be returning for the second semester. A feeling of let-down or ”second semester blues” is normal.

How to Make Sure Your Financial Support Helps Your College Student

March 15, 2017January 21, 2013 by Vicki Nelson

There is a new study being released in the American Sociological Review in February 2013 that has already received a lot of press, and may be causing college parents concern. The report, by University of California — Merced sociology professor Laura T. Hamilton is titled, More is More or More is Less? Parental Financial Investments During College.

The headlines in most of the articles about this report claim that the more that parents contribute financially to their student’s college education, the worse their student will do in school as measured by cumulative GPA (grade point average). Our concern is that some college parents may not have the opportunity to read beyond the headlines to Dr. Hamilton’s secondary finding and conclusion. This study also determined that students whose parents contribute to their education had a greater chance of completing college within five years. And the researcher’s conclusion is that student success may have less to do with the amount of the financial contribution and more to do with the communication between students and parents about responsibilities and expectations.

According to Hamilton, the negative effect of parental financial support on college GPA is modest, but students ”may be staying out of trouble but dialing down academic efforts.” In other words, students whose parents are paying for the majority of their expenses may not feel as vested in their education and may be willing to ”get by.” She adds, ”Children may direct more effort to school when they personally feel the economic costs of poor performance.” These findings seem surprising to many parents because they seem to counter the assumption that the more that parents do for their students, the better those students will do. Other sources of funding — grants, scholarships, or work-study — did not appear to affect GPA.

How to Support Your Student Who May Be Taking a Break from College

July 31, 2019January 11, 2013 by Vicki Nelson

Fewer students than ever are taking the direct path from high school into college with graduation in four years from the same institution. Students defer enrollment, take a gap year before starting, take a gap year during college, transfer, stop out, or simply do not finish. Some college officials refer to this process of student movement as ”swirling.”

Although the majority of students still enter college and remain until they graduate in four or five years, some students decide to take a break from school at some point. For some students, this is a thoughtful decision. Other students may not have a choice as they do not succeed and are dismissed, or have health, financial, or family issues that force them to stop out for a while.

If your student is one of those who may be taking some time away from school, you may have questions and concerns. You and your student will need to discuss these concerns, as well as your student’s reasons and plans for using this time away.

Academically Dismissed from College? Ten Steps to Move On

December 17, 2019January 7, 2013 by Vicki Nelson

This is the third of three posts on College Parent Central considering the realities of academic dismissal from college. Our first post, What To Do If Your Student is Academically Dismissed from College, has been visited most often and received more comments than any other post on this site over the past several years. We followed with our last post, Academically Dismissed from College? Time for a Reset, in which we discussed some of the causes and emotions surrounding dismissal.

In this post, we look at potential next steps for parents and students to work together to come to terms with the situation. Of course, just as the causes for a student’s dismissal are unique and personal, so are next steps. However, we’d like to suggest a path that might help you and your student move ahead.