Should My College Student Get a Job At School?

August 30, 2022September 8, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

Having a job while in college is a common experience for many students. This is the first of two posts examining some factors that students might consider as they seek college employment. In this post, we look at some general, but important, questions your student might think about. In our next post, we’ll look more carefully at some of the differences between on-campus and off-campus jobs.

Many college students today have a job while they are in college. As we all know, the costs of attending college are high. In addition to tuition and room and board, there are extra fees, expensive textbooks, and living expenses. Many students head off to college knowing that, in addition to their academic work – and possibly their sports or other activities – they will need to have a job. As college parents, we can help our students think through some factors to consider as they decide what kind of job they may want – and a major question of whether to work on campus or off campus.

Helping Your College Student Be a Better Student: Twelve Questions to Ask

March 12, 2018September 3, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

Your college student may have been an outstanding scholar in high school, or he may have struggled throughout his academic career. His patterns of being a student have been set for years. However, college provides a new academic start for students. Students who breezed through high school may find themselves challenged for the first time. Students who found themselves labeled as poor students in high school may find that the fresh start gives them new energy and perspective on their studies.

Whether your student is encountering academic difficulty for the first time in college, or has fought this battle before, you may receive the phone call in which your student worries about her grades, complains about the amount and difficulty of the work, is aggravated at the professor, and is generally discouraged. Academics in college are very different than in high school and they often require a new approach.

What is a parent to do? First of all, listen. Let your student vent. Sometimes, that may be all that is necessary. But second, ask some questions to help your student try to figure out what he can do to make things better. Help him think about taking action. Here are twelve questions that you might ask your struggling student to help him think through the issue.

Be Prepared For the ”Meltdown” Phone Call From Your College Freshman

January 2, 2019August 30, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

It may not be inevitable, but it is common and it is normal. It’s two weeks into your college freshman’s first semester, (or three weeks, or one week, or five weeks) and you get the phone call. It may be three o’clock in the afternoon, but more likely it is midnight. Your student is miserable. He hates school, he is overwhelmed academically, he has no friends, he hates the food, he’s ready to come home. As a parent, you panic. This was all a mistake, he should have gone somewhere else, or stayed home, or commuted to a local school. You are ready to leave home immediately and go to school to collect him and bring him home. At the very least, you are up half of the night worrying about him.

But wait, you are not alone! Understanding that this phone call may be a normal part of the adjustment to college for many freshmen may help. Being prepared for the situation, while hoping that it never arises, will help. Here are some suggestions for what to do if you get that phone call from your miserable college freshman.

Are There Secrets to College Success?

July 28, 2021August 27, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

If there were absolute, no fail secrets to college success that worked for every student, every student would know them and follow them and be successful. The reality is that there are no sure-fire secrets that work for every student. Each student is an individual with unique strengths and weaknesses, coming from a unique background and placed in a unique situation.

However, there are some tried and true tips that help most students. We’d like to offer our three favorite tips. We hope you’ll pass them on to your college student. We welcome you to share your responses and suggestions.

Dual Registration May Give High School Students a Head Start on College

February 27, 2022August 25, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

In two earlier posts, we discussed possible timelines for a college education. Many students currently find that they need more than the traditional four years to successfully complete their college degree. Other students may attempt to complete their college education in less than four years in order to save on tuition fees or to get into the workplace sooner. Each student’s needs, motivation, abilities and financial situation are different.

One path that some students consider, in order to speed their college experience, is dual registration. Dual registration involves high school students enrolling in college courses for credit at the same time that they are completing their high school work. They receive credit for the courses at both the high school and college level. It is sometimes called dual credit, concurrent enrollment, dual enrollment or joint enrollment. Dual registration is not for everyone – in fact, a relatively small number of high school students attempt it – but for highly motivated and talented students, or students with particularly focused interests, it may be just the right thing to engage them during their final year of high school and to allow them to begin working on their college degree while still in high school. This may allow them to save time and money when they enter college.

Two Habits That Will Make Your College Student Stop Listening To You

March 12, 2022August 23, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

As a college parent, you experience a changing relationship with your college student once they head off to college. During their growing years, you have functioned as caretaker, worrying and working to make sure that all has gone as well as possible in many areas of their life. Once your student goes to college, you will have less contact with their everyday life. This doesn’t mean that you will necessarily have less communication with them. Conversations change from “Where are you going?”, “When will you be home?” and “You need to pick up your shoes,” to more interesting and potentially more meaningful topics.

Most of us value our conversations and discussions with our college students. We want to know how their lives are unfolding, what they are thinking and feeling, and we want to share our thoughts with them. Chances are that our students want the same thing – even if they don’t always admit it. However, even with our best of intentions, there are two conversational habits which are what Rebecca Shafir in her book The Zen of Listening calls “listening stoppers”. We probably don’t even realize that we are doing these things.

Take some time to consider whether you might be guilty of either of these habits.

Affirming ”Helicopter Parents”: How To Hover Constructively

March 23, 2017August 20, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

This is the third of three posts that consider the concept of college helicopter parents. The concept is certainly not new, but it warrants continual examination – and sometimes redefinition. In our first post, we looked at the definition of helicopter parents, as well as some of the motivation behind parental hovering. In our second post, we examined who helicopter parents are and how they operate, and in this post, we consider the consequences of helicoptering and suggest some possible ways in which parents might hover productively.

Helicopter parents, (those parents who hover closely over their children, ready to swoop in at a moment’s notice to rescue the student or attack the enemy) have caused colleges to express concern about parental involvement in college students’ lives. Many colleges clearly send messages to parents to “back off” or “stay away”. In most instances, it doesn’t work. Parents continue to be closely involved in their students’ lives because they feel that they are needed to help the student be successful. Many parents may not fully understand the consequences of excessive involvement or hovering.

Affirming ”Helicopter Parents”: A Look in the Mirror

March 23, 2017August 18, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

This is the second of three posts that consider the concept of college helicopter parents. The concept is certainly not new, but it warrants continual examination – and sometimes redefinition. In our first post, we looked at the definition of helicopter parents, as well as some of the motivation behind parental hovering. In this post, we will examine who helicopter parents are and how they operate, and in our final post, we will consider the consequences of helicoptering and suggest some possible ways in which parents might hover productively.

Who are today’s helicopter parents?

Today’s helicopter parents are the baby boomers who have programmed and protected their children since they were born. They are parents who have been involved in every aspect of their children’s activities. Like parents of all generations, they want the best for their children, but they believe that achieving that best requires direct parental involvement.

There are more than a few helicopter parents. According to a recent National Survey of Student Engagement, which surveyed approximately 10,000 students at 24 colleges in the United States, forty percent of freshmen say a parent has intervened to solve a problem for them. The majority of these students are not unhappy to have their parents involved.

Affirming ”Helicopter Parents”: Redefining the Title

March 23, 2017August 16, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

This is the first of three posts that consider the concept of college helicopter parents. The concept is certainly not new, but it warrants continual examination – and sometimes redefinition. In this post, we look at the definition of helicopter parents, as well as some of the motivation behind parental hovering. In our next post, we will examine who helicopter parents are and how they operate, and in our final post, we will consider the consequences of helicoptering and suggest some possible ways in which parents might hover productively.

Helicopter parents have a poor reputation. Actually, that is probably a polite way of putting it. In most of the higher education world, when the term “helicopter parents” is used, it is not used kindly. Even parents who engage in “helicoptering” don’t like to identify themselves as such, “I don’t want to be a helicopter parent, but . . . ” The truth is that many parents do hover, but some do it better than others. The concept itself isn’t necessarily bad, but the extremists have given it a bad name. Perhaps what needs to happen is that more parents need to redefine what it means to be a helicopter parent and learn to do their hovering productively.

What Parents Can Do To Support Their College Student Studying Abroad

September 1, 2022August 13, 2009 by Vicki Nelson

This is the third of a series of three posts about college students and studying abroad. In the first post we looked at some of the reasons why a study abroad program might make sense for your college student. In the second post, we considered how to help your student prepare to go abroad, and in this final post we look at what to do while he is away.

Your college student has headed off confidently (or perhaps with a bit of trepidation) on her study abroad experience. You are proud of her, excited for her, and perhaps, a bit concerned for her. You know that the experience is important and wonderful for her, but you are a parent and you worry. Here are a few suggestions of things that you can do to help ease the transition – for her – and for you.