How You Can’t Help Your College Student Stay in School

March 14, 2021December 11, 2010 by Vicki Nelson

Students work very hard to get into college. Students (and their parents) spend years, and countless hours, making just the right list of potential colleges, visiting school after school, studying for SAT or ACT exams, writing college essays, filling out applications, interviewing, and waiting for that all important letter. Students agonize over the decision to find the place where they feel comfortable, attend Orientations, contact roommates, shop and fill their dorm rooms with all of the necessities. Why then, do almost 45% of those students who began with so much hope and so many plans, leave college or transfer schools before they complete their degree?

There are hundreds of reasons why students leave the school where they began their college education. Some students transfer to another school (often losing credits along the way), some dropout entirely, some stopout and return later, and some slowdown and take longer to finish their degree — often as a part-time student. Because, as parents, we are often used to being responsible for the direction our student takes, we may feel responsible when our student tells us that he wants to leave school.

It is important that college parents understand that there are some factors leading to college success that we can control and help with, and there are factors over which no one has control, or the student alone has control. It is important to separate the two categories. In this post, we’d like to take a look at some of the factors that parents can control (a very short list), and some of the major factors that parents cannot control (a much longer list). We hope that this will help parents understand how varied the reasons for leaving school may be, and also help parents discuss reasons with their college student and help support the college student who may be struggling to succeed.

Holiday Gifts for College Students: Some Suggestions

December 17, 2021November 30, 2010 by Vicki Nelson

Last holiday season we made some recommendations for some gift book suggestions for college students — or about to be college students. Some of these books will help them navigate into, through, and beyond college. We still think that they are good suggestions for holiday gifts for your college student. Some of these books are just for fun, and some provide plenty of helpful hints for surviving college. They cover everything from general advice to cooking, money management and career advice. Check out our Recommended List of Gift Books and find something for your student.

This year, in addition to our book recommendations, we’d like to suggest a few other possible gift ideas for about-to-be college students, current college students, or almost-graduate college students. Of course, you know your student best, and you know what may or may not interest him, but here are a few ideas to stimulate your imagination.

Colleges Are Working to Keep Your Student Enrolled

March 18, 2017November 26, 2010 by Vicki Nelson

Retention is not a new topic, but it is an important topic for colleges. Your student’s college wants him to stay enrolled. It is good for your student, and obviously, it is good for the college. Many students transfer to a different college — often after a semester, a year, or two years. Roughly 55% of students who start college finish school in six years at the same school. There are hundreds of reasons why a student may transfer, some of which are better than others.

If your student talks about transferring, it is important that you help her think about her reasons. Talk to her about whether things will be different in a different place, or whether she might make some changes in her approach in her current school. Many students consider a transfer at some point during their first or second year, but many choose to remain where they are. As you and your student think about the transfer question, keep in mind that most colleges are working hard to help your student succeed and find satisfaction. Your student chose this college initially, and the college selected your student. The college wants this to work. Your student might think about whether she is taking advantage of all of the opportunities provided.

Book Review: College Survival Tips for Parents

December 17, 2021November 20, 2010 by Vicki Nelson

From time to time, we like to review some of the books available for parents of college students. There is a wealth of literature available to help parents cope with the transition to college and the changes that occur throughout the college years. We’ve created lists of recommended reading. Check out our Resources and Tools page for suggestions.

This review looks at College Survival Tips for Parents by Ceil Hall. The book is a companion piece for the author’s book, College Survival Tips, which is geared to students. The subtitle for this book is Fostering Growth and Independence in Your Kids.

Read more

Reasons Why Your College Student May Need to Come Home for a Weekend

June 23, 2012November 12, 2010 by Vicki Nelson

There are many important reasons why you should encourage your student to stay on campus on the weekends and not come home every weekend. Research indicates that those students who are engaged and involved on campus not only do better in school, but also experience higher satisfaction with the college experience. It is important to help your student understand why she should not return home most weekends if that is an option.

However, if your student attends school at a distance that makes coming home for a weekend a possibility, there are some reasons why an occasional visit home for a weekend may make sense.

How Does Your College Student Feel About Their First Job?

March 13, 2024October 30, 2010 by Vicki Nelson

Of course, the best answer to the question of how your college student feels about his first job is to ask him. Every student is different. Every student has different goals and ambitions, different strategies, different needs. Hopefully, as your student has maneuvered his way through his college career, you’ve had opportunities to talk about his dreams and ambitions, and about the realities he will face when he hits the job market.

In spite of all of the individual differences, however, there are trends today in college graduates’ attitudes and approaches toward their first post-college job. If you haven’t already had some conversations with your college student about his career thinking, some of the following information may be a good beginning point for discussion. This information comes from the 2010 annual survey of college students conducted by the National Association of Colleges and Employers (NACE). Between February and April of 2010, NACE surveyed more than 12,000 graduating seniors at over 400 colleges throughout the United States. Here are some of the things that they found.

Reasons Why Your College Student Might Not Graduate in Four Years

November 17, 2021October 24, 2010 by Vicki Nelson

According to national statistics, the average for students graduating from college is now five years rather than four years. Objectively, we may hear that statistic and find it moderately interesting. However, when it is our college student who may take more than four years to complete their college education, we may become not only very interested, but alarmed. We may have seen this coming or we may be taken by surprise. We may understand the reasons or we may not. We may consider the reasons sensible or we may find them ridiculous. We may take the news in stride or we may be angry and upset.

If it becomes clear that your student will need more than the perceived ”normal” four years to complete their college degree, you and they will probably need to have a conversation. Whether the extra time is intentional or takes you both by surprise, you’ll need to make some plans that may include some strategizing and altering of financial or other considerations. There are many factors that might cause a student to need extra time to complete a degree. Understanding some of the factors may help you to realize what has happened, or may help you and your student anticipate or prevent a delay. Here are a few factors that might affect your student’s time to completion of their degree.

Keeping the Dialogue Open With Your College Student

March 12, 2022October 20, 2010 by Vicki Nelson

Before your college student headed off to school, you may have had some good conversations about both their expectations and your expectations, and about both of your hopes — for grades, for money management, for behavior, or for other things important to both of you. At the midpoint in the semester or year, or just a little past that point, both you and your student may be reevaluating how things are going. Your student has settled in, more or less, has made some friends, has developed habits of behavior, and has likely received some midterm or first semester grades or indications of academic progress.

This is a good time to revisit some of your earlier conversations about hopes, dreams, and expectations. Your college student has weathered tremendous transitions during the past few weeks. They have had to adjust academically and socially, and had to create a their place in this new world. You may have had lots of communication with your student, and you may know exactly how things are going, or you may be wondering how the adjustment process has gone. This is a good time to check in again with your student.

College Parenting With the College Calendar

September 10, 2021October 16, 2010 by Vicki Nelson

As a college parent, or pre-college parent, you probably used the calendar diligently to watch the deadlines for college fairs and open houses, college applications, financial aid forms, deposit deadlines, and housing deadlines. Now that your student is actually in college, you may be thinking largely in terms of first and last days and breaks when your student will be home.

Hopefully, your college student is paying attention to important dates on the college calendar, and on his class syllabi, to keep track of his own important deadlines. For parents, however, keeping an eye on the college calendar will help gather a sense of the rhythm of the college semester and year. Taking note of important dates will help spark important conversations with your college student and give you a snapshot of some of his activities.

Your student’s college may send a copy of the year’s calendar home, but it is also almost always posted on the college’s website. Many colleges update the online calendar frequently and include all of the activities happening on campus. Try to make it a habit to check the calendar, and to use the information there to help you understand your student’s world. Here are a few suggestions of things to watch for and think about.

When Your College Student Changes Majors

March 14, 2022October 11, 2010 by Vicki Nelson

It may come during a phone call. It may come through an e-mail. Or it may come during a visit home. Your college student lets you know that they are changing their major. Although some parents may quietly celebrate, for many other parents this is disconcerting, if not frightening, news. The most important thing to remember is — don’t panic!

A change of major may be a small step, or it may be a giant leap. Your student may have chosen their original major for many reasons — some better than others — and they may be changing for many reasons — some better than others. It also matters what the majors are and when the change is happening. Obviously, a change of direction in the first or second year of college is different than a shift during senior year – but senior year isn’t out of the question.

It may help if parents understand that most college students, some studies suggest a figure as high as 80%, change their major at least once. The average may be as high as changing majors three times during the college years. It also helps to consider why students may choose their majors in the first place. According to a study conducted by NACE (National Association of Colleges and Employers), 66% of students choose their major based on a career in which they are interested, 12% say they ”drifted” into a major, 9% say they were inspired by a particular teacher or professor, 7% chose a major based on earning potential, and 6% say they were influenced by friends and family. Clearly many choices are being made for reasons other than following the student’s heart and mind.